Absence.

I'm sitting at a desk in a nice quiet house on a Sunday afternoon...and the silence is beautiful.
The last few weeks I've been struggling to get a grip and get a move on, so to speak. My head's been spinning, my heart's been aching (and don't get any ideas, there hasn't been a sudden acquisition and subsequent loss of some mysterious young man.) , and I've just felt a particular attraction to my bed. Despite the fact that Taylor's got a really bad cold, which she's in the process of passing to me, and if I don't get that one, maybe I'll be lucky enough to get the stomach virus that's on the other side of my floor, the world isn't all darkness!

Monday it was ridiculously warm, at 7 degrees and raining. Full out hear-the-drops get-soaking-wet raining, and it was lovely. A bunch of snow melted away, leaving green grass and big, salty puddles everywhere. Even in the city, the rain made the air smell good and the breeze feel fresh. And as an added bonus, the cars are looking cleaner! Sadly, this meant that the canal had to close again, and so there were to be no more skating adventures this week.

The balmy weather quickly disappeared, and by friday it was -25, with a -33 windchill. Taylor and I, lovely sick students that we are, needed to go to the drug store to get some cold-combatting supplies. On went the coat, the mittens, the toque, the socks, the boots - and out we went. And to my surprise, it didn't kill me. In fact, it was so much more bearable then I had imagined! Yes, I was only outside for 15 minutes (but we were walking against the wind!) but I honestly had dreaded this cool weather, and it wasn't that bad. Saturday was 5-10 degrees warmer depending on the Wind, and as I trekked around downtown trying to find somewhere to get an eye exam, I found myself enjoying the icy air.

The canal was so much clearer than it's been so far, and with no skaters on it, only the reflectino of the black sky and yellow lights which line either side, I could almost believe that it was just water, or glass, or paint. Eerily tranquil.

Last night I took some cold medicine, and even though it still took me a long time to fall asleep, this morning, when I woke up, I actually felt rested for the first time since being back from the break. I got up, got dressed, and caught the bus with no rushing for once...and it was a good morning. I recognized the busdriver - the nice busdriver. And it's worthy of "the," because friendly busdriver's seem to be hard to find around here. The bus was quiet, and I listened to some music without having to blast it to hear the words. I got off at Place d'Orleans and waited in a heated bus shelter for the next bus. I arrived at church and sat humming along to the piano while everyone came in. I like being early for church. And then I was greeted with a cheery goodmorning from the lady who sits behind me that I finally met last week. I liked listening to her talk about her children and grandchildren, or about the weather, or the music. This week was "orchestra" Sunday, so there was even more excitement about the music. When we got up to sing, I sang. And even though I'm sick, my nose is plugged, and my throat is sore, my voice sounded like my voice. It sounded like it belonged.

I've been filling out applications for mission trips this week, and one of the sections is inevitably about my home church. Every time I get to that question I find something else to do. Is Knox my home church? I grew up there. I'm a member there. My family's there. Is Grace my home church? I come here every week. I' m going to be in Ottawa more than I'm in Sooke this year.

Last night Taylor and I were talking about how much better it is to be at home when you're sick. And this morning, going to church, it finally felt a bit like home.

Lane's up from a nap now, and Lianne will be home soon with the rest of the family, so my quiet has ended in favour of friends... and potentially FINALLY watching V for Vendetta.

I miss and love you all! Go to the beach sometime soon - I dont care that it's Winter! There's a peace there that you can't find anywhere else, and it's worth the cold.