Maybe a little distracted...

(Friday Afternoon, March 12)
Right so...these are the notes I took during English...

“Describing this room and the board, and the lights on the ceiling and the back of the room, and the still faces is not describing the reality of this room. The reality of this room is what is going on inside of each of us."

Some of the pictures on my wall are crooked. Actually, an entire arrangement of photos is crooked. Little reminders of people and places I love, meant to be perfectly lined up on the wall instead dip down a little to the right. And I haven’t fixed them yet, even though I so often look up at the wall, and feel as though my own work is mocking me. I put them up that way. I put them up imperfectly. Is it silly that on par with my desire to fix them is my desire to stand up to them?

When I look past the lines, I’m caught up in the faces. In one picture, life is so carefree. I think I’m seven or eight – young enough that I’m completely comfortable to be spending the day outside in my first two piece bathing suit. Young enough that I’m completely content to be spending the day with my brother, playing with logs and rocks in the cool, shallow waters of the San Juan River. I can feel the sun beating down on my shoulders and hair in another. I can hear the waves coming in against the shore, and Emily coming up with excuses to not be in the picture. But I win, and we lean in toward each other, smile, and capture a moment at the beach during a grade 12 spare. One of my favourites is a photo from a camping trip a few summers ago. Devon, Emily, Justin and I were hanging out amid a massive log jam. Devon tried to take a picture of me: but it flashed a little too soon. I’m just about to smile – but I look like I’m going to kill someone. And Justin seems to be lurking in the background, making a silly and somewhat scary face. I remember how horrified I was with this picture at the time. And now, I smile every time I see it. It reminds me of how little some worries are. It reminds me of how much perspective can change. It reminds me to think beyond the moment.

Yesterday I received some encouraging info about my mission trip. It’s still not set in stone, but it seems to becoming more of a reality. My mission trip to South Africa in 2007 was so life changing – I am more than excited for the experiences I’m sure to have if I go to South East Asia.

Surrealism: dream and reality combined together